Slammin’, aka Tricia who I knew first in our photog circles, and then in our roller derby lives. A person of many talents, lover of dogs, and cracker of jokes. And another person I know who has had a fair amount of life changes as result of the Covid.
No work? No derby? Time to get back to the artist you are! What she’s been creating during this time has been some beautiful coasters and plant holders. It’s been one of my highlights when I sign into social media to see one of her videos showing her creative process. Art and creativity has definitely been what I have turned to during all of this, and I know I am not alone in that. Combine that with her past as a social worker, and she has a lot to share about getting through times like this.
Like everyone in this project, Tricia shared these words with me weeks before the protests. But her words remain relevant whether we are in a pandemic, a fight for civil rights, and any other uncertainty that comes along with big life shifts.
Slammin T Jammin at Maine Roller Derby Practice at the Portland Expo, sitting on the sidelines due to some shoulder pain.
Name: Tricia Jamiol
Occupation/Business: Formerly an operations manager at a small local business, but have since been laid off due to COVID. And owner of Tricia Jamiol Photography.
1. What is one notable change in your life since Covid19 has changed how we are able to do things? Covid19 has changed everything in my life. I was originally told to work from home back in mid March, prior to the city of Portland issuing their shelter in place order. I was then furloughed once the order went through, and a few days after that, completely laid off. I went from a very predictable 60+ hours where I'd be out of the house working or playing roller derby each week to suddenly having a vast amount of time that I somehow needed to fill.
It has also completely changed how I do life outside of my home. Masks are now a requirement, as far as I'm concerned, and my fiancée and I try to venture out once every two weeks to go food shopping and get any essentials we need from places like CVS or the pet store. I hated food shopping before this pandemic, so I really hate going now. Paying attention to all the rules, making sure I distance myself from other people, some of which who don't seem as concerned as I do about it, and wiping everything down when we get home is mentally exhausting. I am a former social worker and 100% realize that all of us are living through a prolonged traumatic experience. That repeated exposure, for me, means that I typically have a couple of days where I can't do much and it's taken me a while to realize that 1) I don't need to be productive to the standards we had prior to Covid19 and 2) having those breaks and space to process, cope, grieve, is absolutely necessary.
The other thing it's changed for me is my ability to play roller derby. Derby has been a constant in my life for the past three years. Every week I knew where I would be on Monday, Wednesday and Thursdays for hours at a time. I would look forward to our Saturday bouts on an almost monthly basis and even the Sunday morning hangover bouts where my body was absolutely exhausted from playing the night before but there was no place else in the world I'd rather be. I sometimes spent 12 hours a week doing derby related things. Covid ripped all of that away from me seemingly without warning. As I'm writing about all of these changes, writing about missing roller derby is bringing tears to my eyes. I miss my friends, I miss my ability to exercise, I miss being able to go to the gym twice a week for cross training. I miss the body that I had from all of those workouts that so quickly slipped away once everything shut down. I miss the feeling of skating fast and hitting my friends at full speed while jamming. I even miss waking up the next morning feeling like I got hit by a mack truck. We've had a few Zoom meetings, which is nice because we can see each other, but missing roller derby hurts. It also hurts knowing that even as states begin to open up, we won't be able to play such a contact-intensive sport for a very, very long time.
2. What has been most challenging? See above re: derby. Whenever I am grieving the loss of normalcy, 99.9% of the time it's because I'm missing derby.
3. Have you found any silver linings you care to share? Going from having no free time due to my job, roller derby, and my photography business, to ending up with what seems like an endless amount of free time, has given me a silver lining during this whole situation. I've been able to throw myself back into my art. Art, prior to derby, was how I processed things, how I de-stressed, and how I connected with myself on a deeper level. Sometime within the past year I stumbled upon epoxy and resin art on Instagram. I had been wanting to try it for a while but I didn't feel like I had the time to do so. I also had absolutely no idea where to start or what I needed to buy for it, so even researching it seemed unobtainable because of my busy schedule. As soon as I was able to work from home I decided to buy the necessary supplies and give making coasters a shot. Due to not having any patience, I completely botched my first set, as they never cured and were sticky and horrible-looking. It took another try with a bit more patience to get a new set to cure properly, and from there I've just been experimenting with different pigments and techniques and I'm having a blast with it. The coasters have been super popular and I'm starting to branch out into different types of coasters (haha, this just cracks me up for some reason) as well as experimenting with alcohol inks, which is another type of fluid art. You can make coasters out of alcohol ink, too! I HAVE SO MANY COASTERS!
Covid19 has given me the gift of being able to find a medium that would potentially allow me to create art for a living, which is something I've always wanted to do. I am absolutely horrified by what it is doing to the world, but also, somehow, grateful for it. It is a weird juxtaposition that I have some serious cognitive dissonance with, but I'm working on accepting the fact that sometimes, bad things happen and good things are able to bloom because of it.
4. Are there any shifts you are hoping to stay in place as we move forward?
Going forward, when things return to "normal" I truly hope that I'm able to grow my art making in a way that allows me to do it for a living. I've always wanting to work from home and have always wanting to be able to support myself through my art. My photography business was a small way that I was able to tap into some of that, but because I focus on weddings, I never felt that I could fully devote myself to doing it full time.
5. What are you most looking forward to being able to do again?
Hitting my friends!! When we finally have the ability to practice again with contact, I will literally be the happiest person in the whole world. I cannot wait for roller derby to start up again. With the news of Happy Wheels likely being able to open back up this fall, I am stoked.
6. Anything else you want to share..?
I hope, after all is said and done, that we as a human race wake up. With the way things are currently, it makes me anxious to read up on the news. There's so much hate and greed that I can't really comprehend any of it. I feel that this virus has brought humans to our knees, and in doing so, we were given a gift of a healing planet and the ability to see our impact on it, as well as each other. I hope, after all is said and done that humans can learn to be more kind. More kind to each other, to other living things and to our planet.
Also, and I think this is super important: that people be kind to themselves in times like these. I was a facilitator at the Center for Grieving Children for 14 years. I helped run bereavement groups and during my time there I facilitated every children's group between the ages of 3 and 18 years old. I've learned that with death, we need to grieve in order to come out the other side of it. Connecting with others who are sharing similar losses, talking about struggles, life, and accomplishments, and hearing others' stories is incredibly important when it comes to healing one's heart. Obviously, we are losing so many people to this virus. Being in Maine, I feel we are lucky in that our number of causalities and infections is relatively low compares to other places in the country, but with that said, we are still going through something incredibly hard. You may not have directly lost someone, but you have definitely lost a sense of safety, normalcy, or predictability. Those losses are huge and each of us has the right to grieve the loss of those things that are important to us. I haven't seen my parents, sister and her family since early January. I miss them terribly. Thankfully, we have FaceTime, which is huge, but it doesn't replace the ability see, touch, and be with those people. Some days I am a grumpy asshole, other days I'm bawling at commercials on TV, some days I take naps for 3 hours because that's all I can handle that day. I think it is important for others to know that this is okay. That it's okay to take a break from life, whether that's cleaning up the house, or doing whatever chore you set out to do that day. If you don't have the ability to take that break, then reach out to someone you trust and chat with them. Share your feelings. They're probably feeling the same! We are all in this together, and if there's one thing I've learned from the Center it's that those with shared experiences tend to feel more at ease knowing that someone else walking the same path they are. Obviously, we don't wish bad things to happen to others so they can walk on a crappy path with us, but if life throws you a curve ball that you need to deal with, it's nice to have company or a listening ear.
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Thanks Slammin’! Thanks for sharing so much whether it’s your words or your creativity. Looking forward to 1. Skating with you and 2. taking a coaster making class with you. Because, YES, I was and still am serious about that!